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  “Swallow.”

  I do. And he kisses me and whispers promises about returning the favor.

  Chapter Eight

  In Which Lee Montenegro Lies

  When Lee’s coach’s messages blow up his phone, he finally hefts out of bed for the day and showers and dresses like a normal person and kisses me, promising he’ll be back as soon as he can manage. Today, I’m alone.

  I run back to my dorm and grab my textbooks and toothbrush and a bundle of my own clothes. It’ll be nice to wear my own things instead of Lee’s clothes – not that he doesn’t get hard just looking at me in nothing but one of his oversized shirts. But if I keep wearing his clothes and he keeps getting hard so often I’m fairly certain I won’t be able to walk right for the rest of my life.

  As I ride the elevator back up to the apartment, my thoughts catch up with me. What is this thing we’re doing? Is this a relationship? Or just sex? All I know is I’m happy, and Lee laughs a lot. Smiles a lot. He doesn’t get that far-off sad look in his eyes as much, and when he does I kiss it away. I don’t know what this is. But I like it.

  When I unlock the apartment door, I find someone sitting on the couch. Her beautiful sheet of blonde hair is sleek, every inch of her toned and lean. Her off-the shoulder sweater and jeans make her look casually chic – and completely intimidating. She fixes her blue eyes on me and smiles.

  “I let myself in.”

  “Hi, um.” I clutch my clothes to my chest, like I’m trying to hide behind them. “I’m Rose.”

  “Kiera,” She holds up a key from a heart-shaped chain. “A friend of Lee’s.”

  She has the apartment key? I frown and excuse myself, putting my stuff on the bed and coming out to find her standing at the counter, perfectly manicured fingers running over one of my rose-patterned crème brulee dishes.

  “Did he get these for you?” Kiera smiles at me. “He’s good at that - getting gifts for girls.”

  Now that she’s standing I can see she’s exactly my height. But while she’s wearing cashmere, I’m in an oversized sweatshirt of Lee’s. She walks - no, saunters - over to me, and leans in close. Her perfume is light, but her stare is heavy as she picks at my sweatshirt and sniffs it.

  “Smells like him.”

  I pull away. “Sorry if this is rude, but why are you here?”

  “He didn’t tell you?” Kiera’s blue eyes get a faux-wounded look. “Oh, he can be so cruel when he wants to be. But I’m sure he hasn’t shown you that side of him. He likes to pretend he’s a nice boy now that he’s found you, but I remember the real him.”

  I narrow my eyes. “Are you –”

  “An ex-girlfriend? You could say that.” She touches my crème brulee dish again. “But he never really had girlfriends. I was just the girl who lasted longest, the only one who didn’t run away crying. He used them, you see. One by one, went through them like tissues. He loves you. He keeps loving you, over and over, and fucking your brains out, and then -”

  She makes a poofing, vanishing motion and laughs.

  “Did he ever tell you what he did to the other girls? You should ask him, sometime. The girls themselves won’t tell you, of course. They’re too scared. Too ashamed.”

  “What are you going on about?” I frown. “I’m sorry, but this isn’t –”

  “You think you’re special, don’t you?” She sneers. “This has happened before, you know. The weeks of crazy sex and cooking and bad movies. The cute whispered promises of love. He’s done this many, many times. He did it to me. And he’s doing it to you.”

  “You’re lying,” I snap.

  “Right. Because you’ve instantly jumped to the conclusion I must just be a jealous ex. I’m an ex. I know that. And maybe I am a little jealous, I admit to that.” Kiera picks up the dish and tilts it in the light. “But I’m telling you this because I don’t want to see you get hurt. I can’t stand watching him do this to another girl.”

  Something about her words makes me soften, just a bit.

  “I’m sorry, but I don’t think we’re talking about the same Lee. It just doesn’t sound like him.”

  “Let me guess – did he pull the “I knew you when we were kids” card? He didn’t try that on me, personally, but I talked to a girl who had that scenario.”

  “How –”

  “His father is a scam-artist,” She says flatly. “And Lee works with him.”

  “But,” I feel my stomach drop. “The will? My grandpa’s letter? Farlon came to my grandpa’s house and my parents were fine with it.”

  “Were they fine with it? Or just oblivious? Farlon has a talent of sneaking into places he doesn’t belong. He was probably there to research more about you. And the will is a convincing forgery.” She rummages in her purse and brings out a paper. “Here. This was the one they gave me.”

  It’s a letter from her mother, saying that if Kiera’s reading this, she’s dead. She goes on to tell Kiera she loves her, and wants only what’s best for her. She writes that she knew the Montenegro family through their social circles, and that she was close friends the eldest – Farlon’s father.

  “Keep that. It’s a copy. Use it and compare it to the writing on your letter,” Kiera says. “You’ll see. The handwriting looks different, but the g’s and n’s always look the same.”

  “So you’re saying this is all a big scam? The creek? My amnesia? This is…this is crazy.” I grit my teeth.

  “No, it’s a very, very good con,” She sighs. “They target college-aged girls whose family members leave them money. They have connections in the lawyer business, and keep tabs on who’s about to land a windfall.”

  “But I have nothing! I’m a broke college kid –”

  “Who was left a good sum of money in her recently-dead grandpa’s will,” Kiera adds.

  “But, Brett? My grandfather’s lawyer? He was there, he said –”

  “The lawyers are in on it, sweetie. They get paid to fake a few sentences. Trust me, as nice as they might seem, lawyers are in it for the money. Your Brett is no different.”

  “No!” I shake my head. “This isn’t true. This is insane.”

  “How come your parents never mentioned anything, hm? They supposedly saw that ‘will’, too.” She folds her arms over her chest. “Did Farlon say you were above eighteen so it didn’t concern them? Why didn’t you tell them?” She looks me up and down. “Knowing your type, you probably wanted to help your parents out or something, right? So you stayed quiet and didn’t tell anyone about the will. Why would you? Getting married just for the money is shameful. I know I kept it a secret. I didn’t want anyone knowing I was getting married to some guy I barely knew – hot or not.”

  My head goes woozy and the room wobbles. I stagger and Kiera clutches my arm and helps me to the couch.

  “Listen, I know it’s a lot to take in, and I know you don’t believe me. Just go home, get your copy of the letter out, and compare them. The g’s and n’s are exactly alike. Whoever they got to forge them is really good. They watch you for months and do their homework before they send Lee in. Don’t be ashamed. I was fooled too.”

  “So you –” I swallow the urge to vomit. “You married Lee, too? And the other girls before you –”

  Kiera sighs and leans back. “As far as I can tell, there’s been four, including me.”

  “But, Grace,” I whisper. “Grace said –”

  “Oh, you can’t trust anything the sister says, either. She was never around when I was conned, but I wouldn’t trust her. She might not like her Dad, but she loves her brother. She supports him in everything.”

  Kiera grasps my hands and looks me in the eye. “They’ll take it. They’ll wait three months, and then Lee will vanish. You’ll get the divorce notice in the mail a week later. And they legally take half of what the will left you.”

  “But how did you find Lee again? Why did you come here?”

  “Even after I figured out he conned me, I still loved him,” She sneers, but this time it’
s directed more at herself. “I stupidly kept coming back. I kept thinking if I hung around he’d realize I was different from the other girls. And then he stopped seeing me. So I followed him, And then I saw you.”

  I pull my hands away and realize I’m shaking. My amnesia – was that a fake? Was it just my memory being right? Did I really not know Lee at all? The creek story had sounded too convenient – Grandpa never telling Mom and Dad I hit my head, Riley not remembering anyone by the name of Lee. I don’t want to believe Kiera, but what does she have to gain by telling me this? She admitted to being jealous and an ex – she’s not hiding those facts. If she’s trying to pry me apart from him, she’d hide those facts.

  “I…I have to go –”

  “You don’t have to believe me,” She says. “Really. Just check your letter against mine. That’s all the proof I needed when I didn’t believe the other girl who told me. And call your dead loved one’s lawyer and ask if he took a bribe. You’ll see. I’m right.”

  “I trust him,” I say, more to myself than to her.

  “So did I.” She smiles sweetly.

  ~~~

  I rush back to my dorm room. I left Grandpa’s letter in my fancier purse. Selena is studying for once, her desk strewn with worksheets and textbooks, her hair in a messy bun and her hand massaging her forehead tiredly.

  “Whoa! Long time no see,” She says. “Where’ve you been?”

  “A friend’s place.” I sift through my purse and grab Grandpa’s letter and fold the two out, side-by-side. At first glance, the handwriting looks totally different – Grandpa’s the usual large, squareish scrawl I got used to seeing in my birthday cards, and Kiera’s mom’s a curly, neat, tiny print. I look at the n’s. Just like she said, the n’s in both letters have that same tiny curl at the foot, almost like a curlicue. I shake my head. That’s just a coincidence. I look for the g’s, and when I spot them I feel my throat constrict.

  They look exactly the same. The same width in the loop, the same tilt, and to top it off there’s the same crooked tail. Selena, curious, looks over my shoulder.

  “Look,” I point the g’s and n’s out. She nods.

  “Looks like the same person’s handwriting.”

  I sink into my chair, my skin losing all feeling. I go numb. This can’t be right. Lee can’t be conning me. Not after everything he’s said. Not after the way he’s looked at me, smiled at me, touched me –

  Or maybe I was deluded all along. Maybe what I originally thought was right. I melted too quickly, didn’t I? I was too easy. Why would a guy like him even like quiet, nerdy me? Though I said I’d never like him, I ended up sleeping with him within a month. And every day I crave him more, burn for him in the deepest parts of me, happily and blissfully ignorant of his feelings for me. I never asked him. He never said it out loud. His actions in and out of bed spoke loudly, but what exactly were those actions saying? For all I know, I’m just another one of his girls. What am I to him? Just a con? Just a money bag?

  I dig around in my purse and pull up Brett’s business card. The phone rings twice and he picks up.

  “Hello?”

  “Brett, it’s me. Rose Jensen.”

  “Oh, hi Rose, can I call you back? I’m in the middle of something –”

  “Did you really take a bribe from Farlon Montenegro?”

  There’s a long silence. It’s practically a yes. I almost hang up in disgust when Brett’s voice comes back on.

  “I’m sorry, Rose. My wife isn’t feeling her best, and I needed the money for the medical bills –”

  His words are so final. I don’t even have the heart to snarl at him. I hang up, and nearly drop the phone as my hand goes limp.

  “Whoops!” Selena saves it from hitting the floor. “Hey, you feeling okay?”

  “I-I…” I can’t form words. My throat is too tight and I feel like vomiting and the ceiling is spinning. Brett took the bribe, just like Kiera said he did. The letters match.

  Lee’s been conning me.

  This whole time, I thought I was in love, and Lee’s been playing me like a puppet. The arranged marriage will is fake. The real will probably gives me some money, and all along, Lee’s been out to steal that, because he wants to run from his conning father. Or was that a lie, too?

  He doesn’t love me.

  Is that a lie, too?

  I dry heave and Selena helps me into bed, and the last thing I see is her tanned face looking concerned.

  ~~~

  The dream comes back, the one about the sunflowers. Except this time, the entire field has wilted. Brown replaces gold. It looks like the field I saw when I went to Grandpa’s house to clean, except it’s not winter in the dream. It’s hot as ever. Too hot. The sun is beating down on me and the cicadas are mocking me with their calls. Everything’s twisted and wrong. I don’t want to find the boy anymore. I don’t want to run and save him.

  I want him to go away. I want to stop thinking about him.

  Grandpa stands in the middle of the field. I run up to him, and he pats my head and his face is Professor Cruz’s. Your scholarship is up, she says. I’m sorry. You’ll have to leave school.

  I run from her, crying, and someone scoops me up. Another Grandpa. But this time his face is Mom’s worried face. We’re going to have to let the company go, she says. I’m so sorry, Rose. I love you. But everything I love is in the company, too. Another Grandpa comes up, with Dad’s face, and they start screaming at each other and I jump out of Mom-Grandpa’s arms and run.

  Suddenly, the sky is raining envelopes. I open one and inside is my acceptance letter to UCLA. All of them have the same letter inside. The pride and happiness I got opening it for the first time as a high school senior is now nothing but bitter regret that makes me cry. And cry.

  And cry.

  I hover in and out of dreams and a hazy, dark reality. Sometimes I wake up and it’s daytime. I feel like I’m burning up. I touch my own forehead and it’s scalding. I vaguely store away slips of memory – Selena’s face, someone brushing hair off my forehead, someone tipping water for me to drink, a hard spoon in my mouth with cold medicine on it.

  At one point, I see Selena lead someone in. Someone tall, with dark hair and bronze skin. I sit up and yell.

  “No! Get away from me!”

  “Rose –” His voice wavers.

  “I said get away from me! Leave me alone! I don’t ever want to see you again!”

  “Rose!”

  “No!” I scream. “No, no no no! Leave me alone!”

  I scream over and over, until he backs out of the room with wounded eyes. The ceiling and walls whirl in my vision and I black out.

  When I finally wake up for good, I feel achy and groggy. I sit up and instantly recoil at the smell of myself – sickness and BO. It’s dark outside. I’m in the same shirt I was wearing when I came home from Lee’s apartment. I wrinkle my nose and strip out of it, throwing it across the room. I test my legs, walking over to my closet and fishing out a fresh shirt. My bedside table is covered with empty cups of water and a half-finished bottle of cough syrup.

  “Looks who’s up,” Selena says as she comes in. She pulls off her jacket and earrings, her hair mussed and her stride a little tipsy.

  “How long was I out?”

  “Four days, just about. On day two I got worried. The nurse came in and said it was a fever, but she didn’t think you needed medicine beyond cough syrup. Said you’d ride it out.”

  “You,” I start. “You gave me water and stuff?”

  Selena scratches her face sheepishly. “It was the least I could do, after all those times you helped me into bed after a party.”

  “Thanks.” I smile.

  “I wanted to say sorry.” She sits on her bed. “I answered your phone while you were out. This guy wouldn’t stop calling. So I said he could come over and see you. And when I let him in, I realized it was –”

  “Lee,” I say with bitterness.

  She nods. “I didn’t know you two were a
thing. I, um. I tried to –”

  “Sleep with him. I know.”

  Her mouth makes a little ‘o’. “I just wanted to say sorry. If I knew you two were a thing, I wouldn’t have made a move. That’s not my style.”

  “It’s okay. It doesn’t matter anymore.” I shrug. “He and I won’t be seeing each other again.”

  Selena doesn’t say anything after that. She sits on her bed with her laptop and I start towards the showers. I wash the layers of sweat off, and my words echo in my head. ‘We won’t be seeing each other again’. Just thinking it sends a hundred needles to stab at my heart. Under the water of the shower no one can see my tears. So I let them flow. I fell for it. I became just another one of his conquests. Just another girl he conned. I was never anything to him.

  But for a while, he was everything for me.

  I call everyone back who left messages - Jen left two, sounding really worried. Kory left one, asking if I can work his shift on Sunday. Mom left one, asking why I didn’t call like I usually did on Wednesdays. Lee left three messages. My hand hovers over the voicemail button, but I make up my mind and delete his without listening to them. I delete his texts, too.

  “Are you serious?” Jen sounds incredulous when I call and tell her. “Rose, you can’t believe this chick –”

  “It makes sense,” I argue. “The way Mom and Dad were never notified about my part in the will, why Riley doesn’t remember Lee or me bumping my head. The letters are the same handwriting.”

  “Yeah, but what Lee said makes sense too!”

  “And what about Brett? When I confronted him, he admitted to accepting the bribe from Farlon.”

  Jen’s line goes quiet. After a beat, she sighs. “I don’t know what to tell you. All I know is I know Grace. She’s not involved in anything bad.”

  “She’s not. She’s definitely not,” I agree. “But Farlon and Lee are. Maybe Grace doesn’t even know. Farlon’s the mastermind. Not everything Lee said was a lie. I know that much. He loves his dad. That’s why he works with him.”

  “Geez, I know he’s a conceited jerk, but Lee really didn’t seem like a bad guy. My decency radar is usually spot-on about this sort of thing. And a father-son con team that targets girls? It sounds way far-fetched.”